Even though this was always supposed to happen, this was never really supposed to happen.
Of course it would be Gamboa Constrictor who launched this thing into Thursday night's DUAN, revealing my silly exercise to the subjects. Yikes. Thanks a lot there, homes. You could have just returned one of my many thousands of phone calls, or, you know, looked out your bedroom window and smiled once or twice. That would have been just fine.
While I clean the vomit off my desk and keyboard, let me say, first and foremost, that I never imagined anyone anywhere would actually read this. Secretly, I always assumed the 3 comments ever posted to this blog were from my roommates, either screwing with me or encouraging me, but it turns out at least a few people have seen it, and now a whole hell of a lot of people are looking at it. I'm not sure how I feel about this, beyond the initial rush of terror. Somewhat recently, one of the aforementioned fellas walked in on me in the throes of masturbating, in such a way that I really couldn't cover it up at all, and had to face up to my shame, much to our mutual embarrassment. That's exactly, exactly what this feels like.
Now that it comes to it, I'm not exactly sure whether this thing will exist in the morning. Now that the spotlight's on, I may be a bit too snarky for my own liking. I am almost certainly too snarky for the liking of a great many perfectly qualified Deadspin commenter who I've mercilessly picked on from the comfort of my very own computer.
For the time being, I'll say the following; I don't consider this blog an ugly betrayal of Deadspin camaraderie, if only because I very rarely comment any longer on Deadspin, having been many times over eclipsed by newer, better commenters. Does this make me unqualified to rip people I pretty strongly consider better commenters than I? Yeah, maybe. Again, realize this was never really intended to be seen.
So, if you're pissed at MadBastardsAll.blogspot.com, I understand. It may all be over very soon. In the meantime, by all means, please continue to compare me favorably to my favorite commenters. I'll be quaking over here in the corner.